Tonight God has reminded me of His faithfulness. We are pushing against our first really big payment and just don't have the funds. I know in my head that God will provide and I tell myself this over and over, but my heart just can't quite grasp it. Have you ever had that?
Anyway, I have cried out to God over and over this week and He has been faithful to reassure me. On Tuesday my Bible reading/devotional was from Psalm 37. God gave me verse 5: "Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this" I just knew this verse was for me. Over and over I would just say, Lord this is yours. You told us to step out in faith. We are trusting You.
Even so, today is Thursday and we are still without funds. All my little messages about fundraising seem to have fallen on deaf ears. I was again discouraged. God knew that and gave me Psalm 46:10 this morning. It says, "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." Okay, Lord, I'm trying to be still and trust.
Now many would say, okay that's coincidence that your readings are those verses. Some may even say I searched to pick just the right verse. NOPE. My Bible has little devotions that start on a Monday and continue throughout. God knew where I would be on these two days and knew I needed these readings. Not to mention our advent readings have been about Abram and Sarai and how God told them to go without giving a map. That is how I feel and even in that God was faithful to provide. I mean our sweet girl gets her name from this story of God's faithfulness. How can I doubt?
Well, I am continuing to try to trust and be still. And praise God, He has been faithful. Tonight alone we have received three donations!! We have a bake sale scheduled tomorrow (although half my baked goods have flopped) that will help. There is still a large gap between what we have and what we need, but my spirit has been boosted and I am trying harder to "be still and know."